Queria ser engenheiro de letras, ou poeta de projetos.

sexta-feira, junho 10

Minhas decisões difices.

Bem, estava pensando esses dias sobre aquelas decisões simples e que agente toma assim do nada e mudam completamente nossa vida. Algumas foram um pouco estudadas outras foram assim de sopetão, igual a eu fazer a prova de bolsa do senai e do G9. Fim de oitava serie e começa a maratona de provas de bolsa. Dai um dia um amigo meu disse que ia ter uma prova num negocio chamado senai, era curso tecnico, e de graça. Ja que não tinha que pagar nada eu fui né? O pior de tudo é que era o ultimo dia de inscrição e a prova era no dia seguinte. Não sei como passei.

O mesmo foi com a prova do G9, tava tão desencanado que quando cheguei na prova descobri que não tinha levado material!!!! Não sei quem foi a boa alma que me "emprestou" uma caneta e fiz a prova sem lapis nem borracha. Acho que quando agente esta mais tranquilo vai melhor.

Agora vem as mudanças... Muita coisa mudou com essas duas provas (que eu nem queria fazer direito, só estava zoando), primeiro comecei a gostar muito da área de eletrica e conheci muitos amigos tambem, mas isso é normal, sempre que agente entra numa escola isso acontece.

No senai aprendi muito, mas muito mesmo, tive varios professores, tutores e mestres. Aprendi muita teoria com eles e tambem varios valores importantes. Aprendi que a vida não é facil pra todo mundo. Aprendi que eu tinha que lutar pelas coisas que eu queria, e que não posso depender do meu pai e da minha mae pra sempre. Aprendi o quanto gosto de ensinar, principalmente materias técnicas. Uma das coisas que mais me marcou foi quando um colega chegou bravo e falou pro professor que a amiga dele disse que o senai só formava peão de fabrica. Pensei que ele fosse enumerar varios motivos do porque a menina estava errada e para minha surpresa ele disse que ela estava certa, "O senai forma peão mesmo, mas depende de você se vai querer continuar peão ou crescer". Acho que apertir desse momento passei a ver a vida com olhos bem diferentes. Minha vida depende de mim.

No G9 foi um pouco diferente, não tive tantas lições de vida (colegio particular voltado pra vestibular não fica perdendo tempo filosofando), mas encontrei varios amigos de verdade, varios amigos de mentira e varios colegas. Acho que ai que começei a ficar relaxado. Sempre era o menino nerd no fundo da sala que ninguem conversava, menos na hora de provas e trabalhos em equipe. Agora eu percebo que na verdade eu é que me isolava muito, principalmente se a outra pessoa era alguma menina. Com o tempo comecei a me integrar no grupo, tive sorte de conhecer varias pessoas legais que sempre estiveram do meu lado.

E chega o vestibular. Passei em dois, itajuba e são paulo. Decidi ficar por aqui. Foi um ano muito complicado na minha vida. Passei por um belo trauma "S", duas vezes, e estava bem perto de me afastar de muita coisa que eu era. Acho que se tivesse ido pra são paulo não seria mais o mesmo rodrigo, seria algum boyzinho sem nada por dentro que gosta de se exibir (as vezes sou um pouco assim, mas acho que é bem pouquinho!)

Ah, também foi por causa do senai que resolvi fazer engenharia.

Tantas pessoas que conheci, tantas historias que aconteceram, tantas coisas que fiz... a vida seria muito diferente se tivesse escolhido diferente. Não sei se seriam melhores ou piores, seriam diferentes. As vezes acho que teria sido melhor se tivesse escolhido diferente, dai bate aquela depre, as vezes acho que teria sido pior, dai vem aquele sentimento de dever cumprido. Mas em qualquer um dos dois casos me lembro que fiz a melhor escolha pro momento. Mesmo o ímpeto, a falta de pensar resolvi escolher com o coração, com meus sentimentos, minhas verdades, meus valores e minha fé. Quando quem escolhe é realmente você, não tem porque se arrepender.

Obrigado por tudo e por todos, hoje sou um pouco de cada um de vocês, e acho que em vocês ha também um pouco de mim. Como diz o guru do tempo no jogo chrono-trigger: "Cada pessoa, cada coisa viva que você toca, em cada tempo, vai te ajudar em sua jornada rumo ao seu objetivo".

Tomem muito cuidado com o que decidem, pois isso não afetará somente a você, mas tambem a todos a sua volta.

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